Love is one of the most powerful feelings that run the entire Universe, not just this world where we live. It has created and fulfilled everything you can imagine, our World, our galaxy, The Universe, All-That-is. Love goes beyond our comprehension, and it breaks all barriers of time, race, ethnicity, age. When love is in charge, nothing goes wrong and “miracles” happen.
We experience love in different ways, like enjoying our family, our kids, our parents, our pets, our jobs, our friends. However, most of us are seeking that special love that comes through a romantic relationship with a partner. That one who you want to get old together, to buy a home, to constitute a family (if you want it), to share the special moments together, like traveling, watching movies eating popcorn on the sofa, taking a nap, cuddling, sharing our deepest secrets, fears, dreams and the list goes on and on…. Some people call a soul mate or a twin flame.
It is possible to live and to be happy alone, but we like to share our life experience with others. It is so fun to hang out with the ones we love! Isn’t it? Although some people insist on living like they are plants, we are social beings, we have divine sparkling souls, and we all came here to have fun.
So why sometimes it is not that easy to find that one who can make our eyes shine when we first meet? That one who makes us smile when we feel sad or lost in our thoughts. That one who can be in complete silence close to us, but we still feel a sense of completeness, an understanding of the security that an anchor gives to a captain of an anchored boat on a stormy night. That person that, no matter what happens, we can count on, that makes us feel so special, and that gives us happiness and a feeling of fulfillment.
I am not saying that we need someone to be happy, neither that that person is responsible for our happiness. We are accountable for our happiness and our soul fulfillment. No one can do that for us. So please do not say things like “I need to find my other half.” You are full. You are entire.
So why so many people are hopeless about love or the number of the broken heart is so high? I am entirely sure that the high number of divorces and separation nowadays is because of our frustration, our intransigence. We are becoming so selfish, so uncompromising and so lost in the trap of our mind that we blame the other for our dissatisfaction. We are always right! Our partner is responsible for giving us this and that, and if he/she is not doing what we think he/she was supposed to do, we assume that the relationship is not working and the best thing to do is to put an end to it. That simple. Like changing a t-shirt. Some couples keep their marriage just for some convenience. They probably have kids, business or they are afraid of being judged by society (or by themselves) for their “failure.” However, their souls are no longer connected. They are probably living at the same house, but the partner is more like a “pillow on the bed” or as an ornamental plant.
The “perfect” one does not exist. I am sorry. Not in the meaning that our society forces us to seek, because like my beloved husband says in his book Waking Up at Both Sides ‘We are all perfect in our imperfection’. I love this statement. Doesn’t it bring you relief? It is like taking a huge rock out of our shoulder. We don’t need to be perfect. We are all in the same game of life, learning how to live, how to survive, how to love, and how to be loved. We are all kids in this big “playground.”

Let me share with you a little episode of my love story. I was 39 years old, lonely in my balcony in Brazil when I asked the Universe for me to find my love, my soulmate. I wanted to love and to be loved. I wanted to know the meaning of love. Six months later I was on vacation in Chicago, drunk in a bar when I met Jurgen. We had good and bad moments together, but love and respect were always there. However, only on a specific day, I felt the meaning of that love. We were in the darkest time of our lives. We lost our money, our close friends, almost losing our home and had no support from some of our relatives. One day, after Jurgen leaving a hospital with more bills to pay, we were both sad and hopeless. To the point of we had no meaning for living anymore. Jurgen was feeling miserable and lost in his thoughts, and I was desperately trying to find a way to solve our problems. As an instinct to protect him, I just hugged him and said to him: “Honey, we can lose everything and everyone, but you have me, and I have you, and I will make whatever is necessary to protect you, because I love you so much, I love you the way you are.” On that moment, nothing was more important to me than our love. Also, I felt for the first time in my life the meaning of Unconditional Love. That was the Universe’s answer to my pray made back in my balcony in 2006. I am writing this one today, 3 years after his passage for another dimension, and trust me: the love is bigger than ever and it will fulfill my soul forever…

Published by Waking Up At Both Sides

I am a Civil Engineer with an Architect soul. I have a small company in Brazil that works with the construction of houses. I live in San Diego, CA, where I have another company Live Cozy San Diego that operates in the field of Real Estate, hosteling, and tourism. In my free time, I drive for Uber and Lyft. I was born and raised in Brazil where I lived until my early 40’s. In my teenage years, my mom converted from the Catholic Church to a Pentecostal church. I was never satisfied with the idea of a scary and intangible god on heaven, ready to send us to hell because we are just insignificant sinners on Earth. On vacation in Chicago in 2006 and more than tipsy, not to say drunk in a bar, I met my beloved Belgian husband Jurgen Vanhauwe, who was a brilliant scientist with a Ph.D. in Biochemistry, specialized in Neuroscience and born and raised in a conservative Belgian Catholic family. He had an intense spiritual awakening (please not to relate this to any form of religion) in 2012 after an out of body experience, becoming a medium. He wrote (channeled) two books talking about the nature of our universe, Source Creator (God), and the pain and suffering he had after his awakening. He passed away in peace three years ago, and one of my missions now is to work in his legacy, to help others who, like me, want to build a better World free of the manipulations of religions and spiritual movement that for millenniums have controlled the human mind. This website is my way to work in the publicity of my blog, that has the same name as his first book “Waking Up At Both Sides.” In this blog, I will, softly and not pretentiously, share episodes of our life, and my life experience after his passing. I will focus on writing about my insights related to topics like interdimensional communication, parallel realities, why we think we need religion, what it could be the god. I want to emphasize that it will not be deep and dense writing. It will be to help us to clear our mind from the old belief system and open it to a different way of thinking. Besides the blog, the website is for the publicity of Jurgen’s legacy. He left almost one hundred of painting arts and two published books. The first one is a non-science fiction named "Waking Up At Both Sides - Discover What You Couldn't Ask," which talks about the nature of this universe. The second one is a science fiction named "The Chronicles of All-Time: Remember to Forget," that creatively talks about the life of Dr. Elliott Himmerept, what it could be his own experience living in an artificial reality in three different timelines (reincarnation or just a game to "higher evolved” beings?). Our great love story is the base of my blog.

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  1. Helpful reading when you’re also cruising this “quicksand field” made of thoughts. Thank you Josemar for your writing and hability to understand others mind’s needs.

    Liked by 1 person

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